Except it's just War AU :)
Dart: Go big or go home!
Ariston: Please, for once in your life just go home. I'm begging you. Go. Home.
Dart: I'm going big! *proceeds to die*
*Dras and Lurker in the nether*
Dras: Oh no, oh no, oh no-
Lurker: What’s wrong?
Dras: I did a thing.
Lurker: You regret the thing you dID-
Dras: *screams*
Lurker: What the fuck did you do- *sees mass of aggravated Piglin* Damn it-
Dras: *screams again*
Sedge: Wow, that was quick thinking on that phony sacrifice stuff.
Nadyne: Oh, that was all real.
Sedge: Wait, you were trying to help them kill us?!
Nadyne: If I’m gonna be sacrificed, I’m gonna do it right.
Star: Ariston, I know you love Dart. I mean, we all do, they’re a very nice person and I respect them immensely.
Star: But I think they might be a fucking idiot.
Ariston: *walking*
Ariston: *sees Ghostbur and Ghost Dart talking* Shit-
Ghostbur, as Ariston runs away: Is... is he okay?
Ghost Dart: I've always assumed he's afraid of ghosts. Not sure why.
Lurker: I CAN'T HOLD IT-
Dras: LET IT GO THEN
Lurker: nO-
<LurkingShad0ws fell from a high place>
Ariston: What the fu-
*the obsidian grid comes crashing down into the L'manhole*
Gaile: ...well, Dream's not going to like that.
Svraxxis: And that is why I need-
XD: No.
Svraxxis: What?
XD: What reason would I ever have to help you?
Svraxxis: ...fair point.
Dras: reject daylight, return to midnight
Dras: Hey, do you want to hang out with us in Pogtopia for a bit?
Sedge: Er, sure...
*later*
Ariston: Aaand who is this?
Dras, lifting Sedge up: Frog.
Lurker: Fine, I'll leave.
Dras: Then go.
Lurker: *belly flops into the water and just floats on the surface*
Dras: Are you gonna...
Lurker: I AM, it's just TAKING SOME TIME