- 1 How to sex
- 2 How to Sex 2
- 3 Trade (9/8/20)
- 4 Welcome Fundy
- 5 Explaination
- 6 Karl is Epic :)
- 7 Blev
- 8 Best day ever
- 9 Only 4 Poki
- 10 Ponk-Ract
- 11 :)
- 12 Eret and Fundy's scam contracts
- 13 Big Q's Funny Hoots
- 14 10 Great Things
- 15 Clue #1
- 16 SJKEOPY
- 17 I Owe You
- 18 (Untitled) Puffy's failed trident sale
- 19 (Untitled) How to sex 3
- 20 House
- 21 (Untitled) W'manberg potential members list
- 22 (Untitled) Dream's prison books
- 23 From Puffy
- 24 BE MY VALENTINE
- 25 1st CLASS
- 26 (Untitled) Bad & Skeppy Log
- 27 Therapuffy requests
- 28 (Untitled) List of SMP members
- 29 (Unknown title) Sam's to-do list
- 30 (Untitled) Red Banquet invite test
- 31 (Untitled) How to sex 3 #2
- 32 Declaration.
- 33 HELP RANBOO
- 34 LORE SUIT 07.06
- 35 U IS SERVED!
- 36 Las Nevadas burger place note
- 37 References
|How to sex|
|Description||How to Sex is the first part of a now four-part series of books written by TommyInnit. It has never been read on stream, but according to both Wilbur and Tommy, it contains strongly factually inaccurate details about sex. It has been agreed upon that it should never be read on stream, but it still resides in Tommy's enderchest.|
No transcript available.
|How to Sex 2|
|Description||How to Sex 2 was a book written by TommyInnit during the early days of the SMP. It was accidentally burnt when Ghostbur fell in lava while having the book in his inventory. How to Sex 1 is in Tommy's Enderchest, and How to Sex 3 was an incomplete book last seen in Logstedshire after attempting to be read by Drista. Another version of How to Sex 3 was started on May 7, 2021.|
How to Sex
Chapter 1: How to Sex
Chapter 1: The tutorial
Chapter 1: The tutorial
Chapter 2: Speaking to Girls and Women
Chapter 3: Having Sex
Chapter 3: Having Sex
DO NOT HIT GIRLS!
Chapter 3: Having Sex
Sex with BadBoyHalo; DO NOT DO IT
Chapter 128: Permission
|Description||Trade (9/8/20) was a book written on August 9, 2020, by PPA (Ponk, Purpled, and Alyssa) as a trade agreement between PPA and L'Manberg when Wilbur and Tommy were trying to get tourists (specifically drug dealers) to come to L'Manberg. The book was destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
Trade Agreement PPA with L'Manberg
Hit men for hire
L'Manberg agrees to supply PPA with *goods in exchange for the following
|Description||Welcome Fundy is a book written around August 13, 2020, by Jack Manifold to welcome Fundy into his new home.|
man/fox/thing such as yourself. Mimicking the underground (which is where foxes live I think).
your new home
|Description||Explaination was written by Jack Manifold at some point around August 20, 2020. It was found in a chest in Tommy's house.|
Under great amounts of pressure coal can form into diamonds.
Bury these in the ground and wait a few million years and you will have your diamonds.
|Karl is Epic :)|
|Description||Karl is Epic :) was written by Karl Jacobs on September 2, 2020, as an agreement between him and Fundy. It was destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
|Description||Blev is a document that was written on September 25, 2020, as a visa to authorise Tommy, Wilbur and Technoblade's temporary entry into Manberg. It was written during Ninja's visit to the SMP, and is signed by Ninja. It was destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
This document declares that Tommy, Wilbur and Technoblade have one free pass to Manberg [FOR THREE HOUR] [BUT ONE WEEK OF SOCIAL SERVICE FOR WILBUR AND TOMMY] [AND JAIL TIME] GOD NINJA IS SO FUCKING SEXY WHEN HE CROUCHES FAST (5MINj
|Best day ever|
|Description||Best Day Ever is a book written on September 25, 2020, by GeorgeNotFound and signed by Ninja. It allowed Tommy and Wilbur to be granted a secondary visa into Manberg. It was destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
i am married :)
|Only 4 Poki|
|Description||Only 4 Poki is a book written on September 26, 2020, by Karl Jacobs. He left it in a chest in the treehouse on Party Island with some glowstone dust arranged into a smile. It was intended to be read by Pokimane when she joined the SMP but was stolen by Tommy before she could read it. Karl later confronted Tommy about it but the latter refused to return the book. Ponk would later find the book in Pogtopia and store it in his Ender Chest.|
|Description||Ponk-Ract, a portmaneau of "Ponk" and "contract", is a book written by TommyInnit on November 3, 2020, authorizing Ponk to sell essential oils to the members of Pogtopia as long as he had permission from an online member of the faction. The "Dream x George book" the contract refers to is the book "Happy Birthday" by Dream, written to wish George a happy birthday.|
TommyInnit declares that Ponk may enter (with permission from online members, NOT offline) Pogtopia and sell Essential Oils.
Expires in 20 IRL Days.
|Description||:) is a book that was given to Fundy by Ponk on November 7, 2020, in an attempt to have him authorise Ponk's sale of essential oils. Fundy added pages 5 and 6, signed the contract on page 4, and signed the book.
[Note: The part in Korean on page 4 may be incorrectly transcribed. According to Google Translate, it says "Unlimited Korean Chicken".]
signing of said contract agree to allways carry one bottle of essential oils on their persons at all time if found with out they are subject to fines
signing this contract also allows us to call upon said person to assist in medical and non medical tasks such as murder,treason and money laundering for the finacial gain of "TOP DOG"
signing this contract gives you
SIGN HERE: ItsFundy
This contract also hereby permits the signer / carrier to enchance the terms of conditions as seemed fit by the party. They are permitted to alter, remove and add terms on the fly.
|Eret and Fundy's scam contracts|
|Description||A series of books written by Fundy and Eret on November 7, 2020, in attempts to scam each other into signing contracts after Fundy had scammed Eret with a verbal contract. "Eret" was written by Fundy, and Fundy also made a copy of it. The other three books were written by Eret. All of them except "Final Contract" were burned, and "Final Contract" was later kept in Ghostbur's library and destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
If fundy says what, the previous contract is void
If Fundy says the word "The", all his stuff is mine :)
All contracts between Fundy and Eret are now void in perpetuity.
|Big Q's Funny Hoots|
|Description||Big Q’s Funny Hoots is a joke book written for Ghostbur by Quackity on November 19, 2020. It was destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
The Very Funny Story
- Wilbur Dimitrius Johnson Soot was walking down the street to find himself walking inside a bar.
Ah, but wilbur stopped him right there, he said the following:
How is life like toilet paper? Youre either on a roll or taking shit from someone
What is 6 inches long 2 inches wide and make everyone go cvray? $100fwq aqbill
|10 Great Things|
|Description||Written by Jack Manifold for Ghostbur on November 22, 2020 as a list of everything he needed to know about Jack Manifold. It was destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
Book of Jack Manifold:
4. Main Character of the SMP and possibly just life. Quite extraordinary really
7. Big man.
|Description||Written by Awesamdude. It was destroyed during the Doomsday War.|
No transcript available.
|Description||Written by Skeppy at an unknown time. It was found by Eret in a chest on Skeppy's skywars islands on December 1, 2020.|
ANYONE WHO READ THIS BVOOK IS OBLIGED TO WILLINGLY SAY A CURSE WORD
|I Owe You|
|Description||A contract between CaptainPuffy and Awesamdude written on December 12, 2020.|
This book signifies that in exchange for 1 Trident, CaptainPuffy will give Sam one open ended I owe you redeamable by Sam at any time for anything he may need.
|(Untitled) Puffy's failed trident sale|
|Description||A book written by CaptainPuffy on December 12, 2020, in an attempt to sell the trident she had just gotten from Awesamdude to BadBoyHalo.|
Trident for sale!
|How to sex 3|
|Description||The sequel to How to Sex 2 written by Tommy during his exile. Its current whereabouts and whether it was ever finished are unknown. (The currently transcribed version of the book was shown to Quackity on December 14, 2020.)|
Sex is like God sex is like God but God is
|Description||House is a book written by Dream on December 20, 2020. It was found in a chest inside the "house" he had built that day after Technoblade bullied him for being homeless.|
dear diary, today I worked on my house. tomorrow I want to build a basement! it's going to be the biggest base ever.
|W'manberg potential members list|
|Description||A book written by Puffy on January 2, 2021. (The date in the book is listed as January 3 as it was past midnight when it was written.)|
|Dream's prison books|
|Description||Five books that Tommy wrote in while visiting Dream in prison (Pandora's Vault) on January 21, 2021.He gave these to Dream as "homework assignments" to write while imprisoned. Dream later burnt them.|
A Guide on How To Get Girls - A Dream Tale
Why - Dream
TommyInnit: The incredible man. Why he is so great - Dream Novel
why badboyhalo sucks - Dream
My name is Dream and I think my viewers (especially the younger ones) should drop out of school & try drugs. Here is why: (a dream novel).
|Description||A book written by CaptainPuffy to Ranboo on February 13, 2021, to explain the sheep she was gifting him as a condolence for his dead bird and cat.|
they brought you ,hopefully you will still enjoy this new addition Ramboo!
|BE MY VALENTINE|
|Description||This book was written by Ponk on February 12, 2021, as part of his plan to ask Awesamdude to be his valentine with the "woo station".|
The numbers on the second page read "Your smile is crazy cute so is your personality" in hexadecimal code.
Sammy Wammy 123
The world is flat but you know what isnt your vubltiuys restone skills, I wish I could learn to code so I could speak to you in
So sam, are you a creeper because you made my heart explode <3.
I say Creeper awwww yes. you brighten my day with all your shananigains.
of the sea.
drink some really crispy water!
because I am not the best cheif and wouldnt be able to handle that good of quality ingreediants
in this era of time
If you ever wanna play me at cup pong here is my number!
|Description||A book written by Ponk to Awesamdude on February 14, 2021. It was to give him an invite to the "woo station" (as stated in the book, non capitalized due to that).|
All aboard the woo station
|Bad & Skeppy Log|
|Description||A book written by Antfrost on February 18, 2021, during a conversation with BadBoyHalo and CaptainPuffy.|
Bad & Skeppy Log
Skeppy works as a maid for Bad and gets paid in ???
|Description||These were several joke requests for therapy found inside Puffy's Therapuffy office. They were all written at some point before February 24, 2021, by Tubbo and Ranboo. One of the unsigned books was erased by Ranboo and reused for Tommy's Church Prime rules on May 15, 2021.|
teach me about economics in todays modern society and how it affects the upper AND lower classes. But not the middle class i could care less about whats going on with them
I WANT TOP KNOW ABOUT THE POLITICAL CLIMATE IN BERLIN
|List of SMP members|
|Description||On March 12(/13 - past midnight), 2021, Eret wrote a book listing all the Dream SMP members while building their museum.|
Dream SMP Members
|Sam's to-do list|
|Description||On March 21, 2021, Jack Manifold found a book inside Awesamdude's base, detailing what seems to be a to-do list. It is unknown when the book was written.|
THE PLAN (is simple)
Bunker in the base
my room - LOWEST IMPORTANCE
|Red Banquet invite test|
|Description||A book written by BadBoyHalo to test invites for the Red Banquet.|
You are cordially invited to the Red Banquet
|How to sex 3 #2|
|Description||The second edition of How to sex 3 was started by Tommy on May 7, 2021. The book is currently in Tommy's Enderchest.|
How to sex 3:
|Description||Declaration. was written by Tommy offstream on May 15, 2021, and was later that day found by Puffy in the chest outside L'Sandberg that was currently being used as a mailbox.|
poo poo pee pee war is wee wee
|Description||HELP RANBOO was written by Foolish on May 22, 2021, and placed in a chest outside Ranboo's house.|
a good for word for me. Thank you very much and I hope you have a wondervul vbady! :D
|LORE SUIT 07.06|
|Description||LORE SUIT 07.06 was written by Ponk on June 7, 2021. The title is a pun on the word "lawsuit". The book was placed in their mail exchange chest near Foolish's summer home.|
Wagwan my G Its your boi Ponk also known as ponk and this book here is for Puffy and BAD Only
- 10 x tresspassing
- Flushing the toilet while still sitting and knowing someone is still in the shower making the water really hot and then cold because you flushed the toilet
and you will be forced to pay for leagl fees and damgages
|U IS SERVED!|
|Description||U IS SERVED! was written by Puffy on June 8, 2021, in response to Ponk's book LORE SUIT 07.06. The book was placed in their mail exchange chest near Foolish's summer home.|
Lore Suit Continued...
first to cause any damages to the others property.
1X Count of Mugging Foolish on his first day
1x Count of literally naming your cat Sacrifice and then bringing into a war to die.. and then somehow being surprised about it.
1000x counts of giving cats bad names and then leading them to their death.
10000x counts for everytime you mention the brand Supreme
you literally were the person who started this all
"Im not touching you" kid.
1x count of stealing Sam's heart
11x count of not using a paper or metal straw.
You've also been served!
Las Nevadas burger place note
|Las Nevadas burger place note|
|Description||This book was placed on a lectern inside the burger place in Las Nevadas.|
YO SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOUR DOORS YOU SHOULD PROBABLY CHECK THAT OUT I THINK YOU GOT THEM HALF OFF AND I DONT MEAN PRICE WISE